A Kinder, More Sustainable Approach
Weight loss is one of the reasons many women first think about getting a personal trainer, and I think we should be able to talk about it without shame, judgement or pretending it doesn’t matter.
If you want to lose some weight because you’d feel more comfortable, healthier or more confident, that’s a perfectly reasonable goal.
But I don’t believe the answer is punishing yourself.
I’ve seen so many different diets come and go over the years. We get excited, become incredibly strict, lose some weight and then real life happens. We go on holiday, have dinner with friends, get stressed or simply get fed up with being hungry, and suddenly we feel as though we’ve failed again.
I prefer a much gentler and more sustainable approach.
When I work with someone who wants to lose weight, I’m interested in the bigger picture. What are you actually eating? How much are you moving? How are you sleeping? Are you stressed? Are you eating because you’re hungry or because you’re exhausted, bored or emotional? And perhaps most importantly, what could you realistically continue doing six months or a year from now?
Because there’s no point creating a perfect plan that you can only tolerate for three weeks.
I also want women over 45 to think about strength as well as weight.
The scales only tell us how heavy we are. They don’t tell us how strong we are, how fit we are, how well we move or how much energy we have.
That’s why strength training is such an important part of my approach. Rather than simply trying to make our bodies smaller, we’re giving them a reason to become stronger.
There’s something wonderfully different about looking at a dumbbell and thinking, I couldn’t lift that a few months ago and now I can.
That’s progress too.
Food is obviously part of the picture, but I don’t want food to become the enemy. I’ve studied nutritional healing and Ayurveda, and I’ve always been fascinated by our relationship with food. I prefer to think about what we can add as well as what we might reduce.
Can we include more vegetables and fruit? More protein? More fibre? More whole foods? Are we drinking enough water? Could we cook a little more often? Could we slow down when we’re eating and actually notice when we’ve had enough?
Those things don’t sound particularly dramatic, and that’s rather the point.
Small things that you can repeat become habits.
I also think we need to get away from the idea that one meal can somehow ruin everything. If you go out for dinner, have a piece of cake or enjoy a holiday, you haven’t failed. It’s what you’re doing most of the time that matters.
Exercise works in much the same way.
You don’t have to train every day. You don’t have to spend hours in the gym. A combination of strength training, cardiovascular exercise, walking, yoga and everyday movement can become part of your normal week.
And if you miss a workout, you haven’t ruined anything.
You simply start again.
Mindset is a huge part of this for me. The moment we tell ourselves, I’ve blown it now, we’re much more likely to give up altogether. I’d rather replace that with something much simpler:
That wasn’t quite what I’d planned. Never mind. What can I do next?
That’s how real life works.
My aim isn’t to help somebody become obsessed with food, exercise or the scales.
I want women to feel stronger, healthier, more energetic and more confident in their bodies. If losing weight is part of that journey, we can absolutely work towards it.
But we’re going to build something bigger at the same time.
We’re building strength.
We’re building habits.
We’re building confidence.
And hopefully we’re creating a way of looking after your body that you can continue long after you’ve reached the number you originally had in mind.
Selena
Personal Trainer, Yoga Teacher & Wellbeing Coach
In Flow Wellbeing Studio, Cheltenham
– A Kinder, More Sustainable Approach
Weight loss is one of the reasons many women first think about getting a personal trainer, and I think we should be able to talk about it without shame, judgement or pretending it doesn’t matter.
If you want to lose some weight because you’d feel more comfortable, healthier or more confident, that’s a perfectly reasonable goal.
But I don’t believe the answer is punishing yourself.
I’ve seen so many different diets come and go over the years. We get excited, become incredibly strict, lose some weight and then real life happens. We go on holiday, have dinner with friends, get stressed or simply get fed up with being hungry, and suddenly we feel as though we’ve failed again.
I prefer a much gentler and more sustainable approach.
When I work with someone who wants to lose weight, I’m interested in the bigger picture. What are you actually eating? How much are you moving? How are you sleeping? Are you stressed? Are you eating because you’re hungry or because you’re exhausted, bored or emotional? And perhaps most importantly, what could you realistically continue doing six months or a year from now?
Because there’s no point creating a perfect plan that you can only tolerate for three weeks.
I also want women over 45 to think about strength as well as weight.
The scales only tell us how heavy we are. They don’t tell us how strong we are, how fit we are, how well we move or how much energy we have.
That’s why strength training is such an important part of my approach. Rather than simply trying to make our bodies smaller, we’re giving them a reason to become stronger.
There’s something wonderfully different about looking at a dumbbell and thinking, I couldn’t lift that a few months ago and now I can.
That’s progress too.
Food is obviously part of the picture, but I don’t want food to become the enemy. I’ve studied nutritional healing and Ayurveda, and I’ve always been fascinated by our relationship with food. I prefer to think about what we can add as well as what we might reduce.
Can we include more vegetables and fruit? More protein? More fibre? More whole foods? Are we drinking enough water? Could we cook a little more often? Could we slow down when we’re eating and actually notice when we’ve had enough?
Those things don’t sound particularly dramatic, and that’s rather the point.
Small things that you can repeat become habits.
I also think we need to get away from the idea that one meal can somehow ruin everything. If you go out for dinner, have a piece of cake or enjoy a holiday, you haven’t failed. It’s what you’re doing most of the time that matters.
Exercise works in much the same way.
You don’t have to train every day. You don’t have to spend hours in the gym. A combination of strength training, cardiovascular exercise, walking, yoga and everyday movement can become part of your normal week.
And if you miss a workout, you haven’t ruined anything.
You simply start again.
Mindset is a huge part of this for me. The moment we tell ourselves, I’ve blown it now, we’re much more likely to give up altogether. I’d rather replace that with something much simpler:
That wasn’t quite what I’d planned. Never mind. What can I do next?
That’s how real life works.
My aim isn’t to help somebody become obsessed with food, exercise or the scales.
I want women to feel stronger, healthier, more energetic and more confident in their bodies. If losing weight is part of that journey, we can absolutely work towards it.
But we’re going to build something bigger at the same time.
We’re building strength.
We’re building habits.
We’re building confidence.
And hopefully we’re creating a way of looking after your body that you can continue long after you’ve reached the number you originally had in mind.
Selena
Personal Trainer, Yoga Teacher & Wellbeing Coach
In Flow Wellbeing Studio, Cheltenham
