Why I stopped counting calories, started nourishing my body, and discovered that healthy eating could be delicious, satisfying and enjoyable.
For much of my life, I believed that losing weight was simply a matter of eating fewer calories and exercising more.
I counted calories, bought low-fat yoghurts, chose diet foods and tried to be disciplined about what I ate.
I thought that if I could just eat less, I’d be slimmer.
But after more than 40 years of personal experience, and many years studying nutrition, fitness, digestion and wellbeing, I’ve discovered that healthy weight management is about so much more than calories.
It’s about understanding how food affects our hormones, blood sugar, digestion, gut health, energy, appetite and mood.
And perhaps most importantly, it’s about learning to enjoy food rather than constantly fighting against it.
Here are some of the most important things I’ve learnt.
1. A Calorie Isn’t the Whole Story
One of the biggest discoveries I made when I studied nutritional healing at around 40 was that not all foods affect our bodies in the same way.
In my twenties, I could happily have a Diet Coke and a chocolate bar for lunch.
I knew how many calories were in the chocolate bar, and that was all I thought mattered.
I wasn’t thinking about nutrition.
I wasn’t thinking about protein, fibre, vitamins or minerals.
I was simply counting calories.
Of course, a calorie is a measurement of energy. One hundred calories of sugar contains the same measured amount of energy as one hundred calories of fat.
But the way our bodies digest, absorb and respond to those foods can be very different.
Protein, for example, requires more energy to digest than fat and generally helps us feel fuller for longer.
Fibre slows digestion, supports our gut bacteria and can help regulate appetite.
Healthy fats provide essential fatty acids and help us absorb certain vitamins.
Carbohydrates are an important energy source, but different carbohydrate-rich foods can have very different effects on blood sugar and fullness.
A chocolate bar and a nourishing meal might contain similar calories, but they won’t necessarily leave us feeling equally satisfied or provide the same nutrients.
I stopped asking myself, “How many calories can I eat?” and started asking, “How can I nourish my body?”
That change in thinking transformed my relationship with food.
2. Understanding Blood Sugar Was a Game Changer
More recently, I discovered the work of Jessie Inchauspé, the French biochemist known as the Glucose Goddess.
Her work introduced me to some fascinating ideas about how the order in which we eat foods, and the combinations we choose, can influence our blood glucose levels.
When we eat carbohydrates, our digestive system breaks many of them down into glucose, which enters our bloodstream.
Our pancreas releases insulin, a hormone that helps glucose move into cells to be used for energy or stored for later.
Insulin also plays a role in fat storage, but it’s important to understand that insulin itself isn’t the enemy. It’s an essential hormone, and body weight is influenced by many factors beyond insulin alone.
What I found particularly helpful was learning how to make meals more balanced.
For example, rather than eating a slice of toast on its own, I might include eggs, avocado or another source of protein and healthy fat.
Rather than eating carbohydrates by themselves, I try to combine them with protein, fibre or fat.
I also learnt that eating vegetables first, followed by protein and then carbohydrate-rich foods, can reduce the blood glucose rise after some meals.
It’s not a rule that everyone needs to follow, but I find it a useful principle.
Another simple habit I love is walking after eating.
Even a gentle 10- or 15-minute walk can help our muscles use glucose from the bloodstream.
And it doesn’t need to be a power walk. A relaxed stroll with the dog is wonderful.
These small changes have made a big difference to how I think about eating.
3. Gut Health Is About So Much More Than Digestion
One of my favourite areas of nutritional science is gut health.
I was particularly interested in the work of the late Dr Michael Mosley and his book The Clever Guts Diet.
The book explores the extraordinary community of microorganisms living in our digestive system, known as the gut microbiome.
Our gut bacteria help break down certain fibres, produce useful substances and interact with our immune system.
Scientists are also discovering fascinating connections between the gut and the brain.
This is often called the gut–brain axis.
Our digestive system and brain communicate through nerves, hormones, immune pathways and chemical signals.
It’s interesting that so much of the body’s serotonin is produced in the gut, although this serotonin doesn’t directly enter the brain. The relationship between gut bacteria, serotonin and mood is much more complex than simply eating certain foods to produce happiness.
When I changed my diet in my forties, one of the most surprising things I noticed was how dramatically my mood improved.
Within three or four weeks, I felt happier, brighter and more energetic.
I had started eating more whole foods, vegetables, healthy fats and fibre, while cutting back on processed foods and alcohol.
I was also developing a regular meditation practice.
I can’t separate exactly how much each change contributed, but the overall difference was remarkable.
It taught me that food isn’t just about our waistlines.
It’s also about how we feel.
4. Eat a Rainbow of Foods
One of the simplest pieces of nutritional advice I give is to eat a wonderful variety of colourful foods.
Different fruits and vegetables provide different combinations of vitamins, minerals, fibre and plant compounds.
Red tomatoes, orange carrots, purple cabbage, dark green spinach, blueberries, beetroot, peppers and broccoli all bring something different to our diet.
And variety is particularly valuable for our gut microbiome.
Different gut bacteria thrive on different types of fibre and plant compounds.
I love the idea of trying to eat around 30 different plant foods over a week, an approach inspired by microbiome research. It’s a useful variety challenge rather than a magic number.
And it isn’t just fruit and vegetables that count.
Beans, lentils, nuts, seeds, whole grains, herbs and spices all contribute to the diversity of our diet.
Healthy eating doesn’t have to mean eating the same salad every day.
In fact, I think it should be exactly the opposite.
Food should be colourful, interesting, delicious and full of variety.
5. Protein Is Particularly Important as We Get Older
As a fitness instructor and personal trainer, one of the subjects I’m particularly passionate about is maintaining muscle as we age.
From middle age onwards, we can gradually lose muscle mass, particularly if we’re inactive.
This matters because muscle helps us stay strong, supports our bones and joints, improves physical function and plays an important role in glucose regulation.
Muscle is also metabolically active tissue, meaning it uses energy even when we’re resting.
Building muscle can increase our resting energy expenditure, although the increase is generally more modest than people imagine.
Nevertheless, maintaining muscle is enormously valuable for long-term health and weight management.
And to maintain and build muscle, we need sufficient protein alongside regular resistance exercise.
Good sources include eggs, fish, poultry, yoghurt, beans, lentils, tofu, nuts and seeds.
I encourage people, particularly women in midlife and beyond, to think about including a good source of protein with their main meals.
Rather than simply trying to become smaller, I want people to become stronger.
Strength is one of the greatest gifts we can give our future selves.
6. Healthy Fats Are Our Friends
For years, I avoided fat.
Like so many people growing up during the low-fat dieting era, I believed that eating fat would make me fat.
I bought low-fat products, avoided oils and thought fat was something to fear.
My nutritional studies completely changed that perspective.
Healthy fats are essential for many functions in the body, including cell membranes, brain health and the absorption of vitamins A, D, E and K.
Some fats are also essential nutrients that our bodies cannot make themselves.
Today, I enjoy foods such as olive oil, avocado, nuts, seeds and oily fish.
Of course, fats are energy-dense, and portion sizes still matter when managing weight.
But avoiding fat altogether isn’t the answer.
I would much rather enjoy a satisfying, nourishing meal than eat something low in calories that leaves me hungry and searching for snacks an hour later.
7. Understanding Processed Food Changed How I Shop
Another important discovery was learning more about processed and ultra-processed foods.
Many products marketed as diet foods are highly manufactured.
They may contain added sweeteners, flavourings, refined starches and other ingredients designed to influence taste, texture and shelf life.
Some ultra-processed foods are extremely easy to eat quickly and in large quantities, making it harder for us to recognise when we’ve had enough.
Processing can also reduce certain nutrients or remove fibre, depending on the food and how it’s made.
However, not all processed foods are unhealthy.
Frozen vegetables, tinned beans, plain yoghurt and wholegrain bread can all be useful, nutritious parts of a healthy diet.
What matters is the overall nutritional quality of what we’re eating.
I now prefer to build most of my meals around recognisable, nourishing ingredients.
Fresh vegetables, whole grains, pulses, quality protein, nuts, seeds and healthy fats.
I don’t need my food to be perfect.
I just want most of it to nourish me.
8. Give Your Digestive System a Comfortable Rhythm
I also studied digestion therapy, which encouraged me to become more aware of how, when and why I eat.
One principle I found helpful was allowing time between meals rather than constantly grazing throughout the day.
For me, leaving around four hours between main meals can create a comfortable rhythm.
It helps me notice when I’m genuinely hungry and when I’m simply reaching for something out of habit, boredom or stress.
There are natural patterns of movement in the digestive system between meals, including what is known as the migrating motor complex.
But there is no universal requirement to wait exactly four hours between eating. Some people benefit from regular snacks, particularly depending on their activity, health needs or medication.
The important lesson for me was learning to listen to my body.
Am I actually hungry?
Am I thirsty?
Am I tired?
Or do I simply need a break?
Those questions have become much more useful to me than rigid food rules.
9. You Can Still Enjoy Cake!
I love food.
I love cooking, eating, sharing meals and enjoying something delicious.
And I certainly don’t believe that healthy eating means never having cake again.
Sometimes I enjoy experimenting with different ingredients, such as using almond flour in baking.
Almond flour provides healthy fats, some protein and fibre, although it’s still energy-dense, and a cake made with almond flour can still contain plenty of sugar.
It’s not about making every treat into a health food.
It’s about having choices.
I might enjoy a piece of cake after a balanced meal rather than when I’m very hungry.
Or I might make something with nuts, fruit and ingredients I particularly enjoy.
But I also believe there’s room in a healthy life for a wonderful slice of ordinary cake.
The difference today is that I can enjoy it without feeling I’ve failed.
And that freedom is incredibly important to me.
10. Stop Thinking About Dieting and Start Thinking About Nourishment
If there’s one thing that 40 years of dieting has taught me, it’s that lasting health isn’t built on deprivation.
It’s built on habits we can genuinely enjoy and maintain.
I spent years thinking about what I shouldn’t eat.
Now I think much more about what I can add.
More colourful vegetables.
More variety.
More fibre.
Enough protein.
Healthy fats.
Water.
Delicious, satisfying meals.
And perhaps most importantly, more pleasure and less guilt.
At 59, I feel healthier, happier and more comfortable in my body than I did for much of my younger life.
I no longer want to spend my days fighting food or worrying about every calorie.
I want to nourish my body, maintain my strength, enjoy eating and feel good.
And that’s what I want for the people I work with too.
You don’t have to spend the rest of your life on a diet to start feeling better in your body.
You can begin by learning to nourish it.
With love,
Selena
In Flow Wellbeing Studio
Further Reading
If you’d like to explore some of the ideas that have influenced my approach to nutrition, these are two particularly interesting places to start:
The Clever Guts Diet by Dr Michael Mosley — exploring the gut microbiome, digestion and the relationship between food and health.
Glucose Revolution by Jessie Inchauspé — exploring how food combinations, meal order and everyday habits influence blood glucose.
These books offer interesting perspectives, although individual recommendations should always be considered alongside the wider scientific evidence and your own health needs.
Coming Next: Why Weight Loss Isn’t Just About Food
In the third and final blog in this series, I’ll explore something I believe is just as important as nutrition: our nervous system, stress levels, sleep, emotions and mindset.
I’ll share how yoga, meditation, breathwork and understanding motivation helped me develop a healthier relationship with food and finally feel at home in my body.
Would You Like to Feel Healthier, Stronger and Happier in Your Body?
At In Flow Wellbeing Studio, I combine my experience in personal training, yoga, breathwork, nutrition education and mindset coaching to help people develop healthy habits that fit their lives.
My approach isn’t about punishment, guilt or extreme dieting.
It’s about helping you understand your body, enjoy movement, build strength and feel your best.
Visit www.inflowstudio.co.uk to find out more or enquire about working with me.
